Analyzing Electronic Arts from our contemporary perspective, it’s easy to think of the company as one that makes its big bucks by churning out sports titles on an annual basis with very little in the way of new additions and fresh content save for the roster updates and occasional graphics overhauls. Back in the ’90s, however, EA possessed a far more pioneering spirit as evidenced by Mutant League Hockey and, Mutant League Football experimental sports titles set in a fantasy-meets-horror-meets-post-apocalyptic world where trolls, aliens, robot, super-humans, and skeletons ban together to play hyper-violent versions of popular pastimes. I’m not sure why these oddities decided to wait until they were on the gridiron to commit murderous acts against one another, but I’ve never been one particularly wise in the ways of foreign cultures.
The Mutant League franchise features a number of all-star monstrosities, but none were as well-rounded as Bones Jackson. Modeled after my childhood hero and resident god-on-earth, Bo Jackson, Bones Jackson is the lone 2D athlete to dominate not one but two video game sports titles. Although the real Bo Jackson shone brightly on the diamond and the gridiron, Bones differed by trampling his rivals in football and hockey.
Mutant League Football is where Bones first broke opponents (literally) as the star running back for the Midway Monsters, an otherwise forgettable team made famous by the game’s premier running back. Each Mutant League Football back is rated in four categories (Speed, Hands, Tackle Breaking, and Energy) in which they can have a maximum of 15 attribute points. Bones, being as much as a smooth operator as they real-life guy he was based on, maxes out at a rather pimpin’ 15 in Speed and Hands, meaning its damn near impossible to catch the fleet-footed brute, and even if you do, the chances of you getting a strip or otherwise causing a turn over are pretty much nil (especially with his Tackle Breaking ability ranked placed at superstar-level “13′). So, basically, when Bones gets the ball, your best bet is that he steps on a landmine and blows himself into smithereens, because putting 6 on the board will be a cinch.
Proving himself to be one of the most skilled videogame athletes ever, Bones made the jump to Mutant League Hockey were he’s one of the best to strap on a pair of blades. His stats are just as awesome/loathsome (depending on whether or not you were controlling him) as they were in Mutant League Football. Talk about instant Hall of Famer – - his Skating, Speed, Stamina, Offense, Passing, Checking, and Fighting are “10”, the highest ranking possibly given to a skill. His Power and Defense are “8”, while his Accuracy falls just short of perfection at “9.” These three “shortcomings” are enough to totally not make him overpowered, right, EA?
Considering how Tecmo programmed its take on Bo Jackson in Tecmo Super Bowl, maybe not.
