
Virtual Vox Pop is a weekly open mic in which we ask you, the reader, to sound off on a particular topic. This week, it’s craptacular games.
You know a game is a substandard mess of epic proportions when you and your friends try to justify its existence. 1993′s Power Moves was, without a shiver of doubt, the worst game that I ever purchased; in fact, the worst game that I’ve ever played. Worse than the NES’ Athena.
Capitalizing on the Street Fighter II craze that had legions of American teens digital whipping each others ass (and in some cases, really real world ass), Power Moves was Kaneko’s rather blatant jacking of elements from Capcom’s smash hit, as well as the two plane fighting system that SNK’s Fatal Fury pioneered. Copying a pair of the most memorable ’90s fighter should have destined Power Moves to greatness, but it tanked horribly due to molasses-slow pacing, poor animation, and moves that were, at times, difficult to execute – - the three faces of death for a fighter.
My friends and I pooled our cash and plunked down $60 or so for this turd, based on the badass box art that depicted one guy getting free dental work done by another – - complete with copious amounts of “sweat.” God bless Nintendo for teaching children a valuable life lesson: it’s OK to snuff someone, as long as you don’t make him bleed.
Due exclusively to the fact that we all chipped in money for Power Moves, we began to spout off about its greatness. Its line sways were better than Fatal Fury‘s. Its character designs were better than Street Fighter II‘s. Its music aced both. We were young. We were dumb.
That’s my horror story. What’s yours?

